


breaking the rules

by SilveryxDark



Category: Fest Vainqueur
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, M/M, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-01
Updated: 2015-10-01
Packaged: 2018-04-24 07:19:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4910260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilveryxDark/pseuds/SilveryxDark
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>When Airu and Gaku first join, Hiro lays out the rules clearly: no dating within the band.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	breaking the rules

When Airu and Gaku first join, Hiro lays out the rules clearly: no dating within the band. The band always comes first, and they are determined that nothing should fracture the bonds between the members. Relationships outside the band are fine, so long as they are discreet. Such relationships going sour would affect the band less.

It doesn’t have to be said that someone’s experienced that before. So no one says it, and simply accept it.

Airu thinks nothing of it, then. He agrees, easily. It seems a no-brainer, and it’s a common rule among bands anyway - his previous bands were the same.

And then, somehow, over time, he falls in love with Hiro.

As much as Airu wants to see Hiro as only a friend and bandmate, he can’t. When he looks at Hiro he finds it hard not to imagine kissing him, feeling that lip ring rub against his own mouth, fingers entwined. When they share the same hotel room (which is often) he is ashamed at how often he thinks his bed cold and lonely, and turns away from looking at Hiro as the latter falls asleep. When they go out to have meals, he can’t stop himself from wishing that they were actually on dates.

He tries to distance himself, then. To stop talking to, and hanging out with, Hiro so much, to give himself some room to breathe, to think. To stop being so infatuated with Hiro. So he won't betray his precious friends.

Only, Hiro is smarter than most people give him credit for. He plays up the oblivious, childlike persona for the fans, and while he can be absentminded, he often isn't.

Hiro confronts him when they are in their hotel room, alone. Airu could not weasel out of the arrangement without suspicion.

"Airu, why haven't you been talking to me lately?" Hiro asks, his voice quiet and cool, though he looks at his feet.

Airu tries to smile. "What are you talking about? I -"

"Airu, don't play dumb with me. I trust you. Be honest with me," Hiro cuts in, looking up at him.

Airu is stunned to see the wetness in Hiro's eyes. His throat constricts. There is not enough air. The thought he might have hurt Hiro, to have caused him any pain...

"Airu, I don't know if it's something I did. I don't know if you're angry with me. I don't like it. If... if there's something wrong, tell me. Please. I want to make things right. I don't want you to hate me," Hiro continues, his voice cracking at the end, his veneer of calm fracturing.

"I don't hate you!" Airu replies, forcing his words out, through the fear and self-loathing.

"Then?"

Airu can't quite identify the emotion on Hiro's face. Anger, frustration... there are those, but more...

Hiro will know if Airu lies. He’s perceptive. Airu’s a crap liar. And Hiro knows him.

He does the only thing he can.

"I love you," he breathes, and already he can feel his heart shattering into a million fragments.

Hiro says nothing, and only stares at him. Airu curls his hands into fists, drawing a shaky breath. "I'm sorry," he says, no longer wishing to prolong the painful silence. "I know I shouldn't. You told us the rules clearly that day. I don't want to do anything to hurt you, or betray everyone. I'm sorry. I'm sorry i fell for you."

And oh God, is he _sorry_. If he could have stopped his fall he would have done everything.

What he doesn't expect to hear is, "I love you, too."

He doesn't expect the touch of warm lips and cold metal on his mouth.

He meets Hiro's kiss, regardless, drowning in his touch, his scent, everything.

"I thought we weren't supposed to..." Airu whispers, when Hiro pulls away.

Hiro's eyes are brimming with tears, and he blinks them away, fiercely. "I know. I wanted to. But..." He trails off, quiet, looking guilty for a moment. "We don't have to date. We could just. Um..."

Airu understands Hiro's offer, as it were, perfectly. He can tell Hiro doesn’t really want to hide, that he wants just as much as Airu to date him properly.

“Why can’t you change the rules?” Airu asks anyway, letting hope flare in him. “You’re the leader.”

“I’m scared,” Hiro says simply, looking at him helplessly. “I’m sorry. Maybe I… I should go...”

Then Airu pulls Hiro into another kiss, and another, and another. Their hands roam, as clothes are pulled away. Their cries are muffled, their movements anxious, tinged with the fear of getting caught.

Airu gets to hold Hiro in his arms, afterwards. Hiro presses a sleepy kiss to his jaw, curling in close to him. They say nothing, only cherishing this single moment together. Airu can’t be sure when they’ll have another.

They do, though. Again, and again. Always stolen moments, kisses frantic, touches hurried. They tell themselves they break no rules. If they were - well, they wouldn’t be here.

They are doing just fine.

 

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by the recent SHOXX Poster Magazine A-Z keyword interview, where Gaku said that there's a "no dating in the band" rule. Of course, he could be joking, but it was too good a tidbit not to make into an angsty story... I'm so down for angsty, secret relationships, I'm sorry :'D
> 
> Might there be a sequel to resolve this, because as much as I'm a sucker for angst, I'm also a sucker for angst ending in fluff? Maybe. :D


End file.
